How to Fire Someone Gracefully
Dear Editor:
What should we keep in mind when we present a 30-day notice to our associate to help maintain harmony and respect?
Dear Reader:
You are obviously approaching this decision in a thoughtful and considerate manner and your intention to maintain harmony and respect for all throughout the process, if it is also shared by your partner and practice manager, will go a long way toward insuring that you achieve your goal.
A great question for the three of you to discuss together prior to the conversation with your associate would be something like, "What will we need to say and do, individually and as a management team, as we fire this employee to exhibit respect and communicate that we have taken the best interests of both the associate and the practice under consideration?" Keep in mind that given the differences in type preferences between you and your partner (STJ in contrast to NFP) that each of you might quite naturally approach delivering this kind of news in very different ways.
Based on your guesstimate of your associates' type preferences, here are some tips for conducting the actual conversation. A key consideration here is the associate's preference for either Thinking (focus on logical implications in decision making) or Feeling (focus on impact on people in decision making). In any case, the goal is to communicate with them in a way that matches their individual type preferences.
If the person you are laying off is an ISTP or INTP (i.e. Thinking is their dominant preference), you would want to:
Be calm and objective
Be direct, frank, and concise
Focus on logical reasons and explanations
Provide detailed concepts, information, or data
Focus on the logical principles underlying the situation rather than on the situation itself
Emphasize reasoning and analysis
If the person you are laying off is an ISFP or INFP (i.e. Feeling is their dominant preference), you would want to:
Communicate in a comfortable, quiet, one-to-one setting
Be supportive, empathetic, quiet, and sensitive
Focus on maintaining harmony and maintaining rapport
Avoid being overly critical or analytical
Provide critical feedback thoughtfully and gently
Show how what you're sharing relates to practice values
Conversations like these are stressful for both parties which can muddy the personality type waters by bringing out exaggerated type responses or even behaviors that are totally inconsistent with naturally preferred preferences. If, during the course of the conversation, your associate doesn't manage their emotional response particularly well the key for you will be to stay focused on your desire to preserve respect and a collegial relationship. You can't control how they will respond, only choose how you want to behave during the dialogue. As with any difficult conversation, a strategy of being authentic, transparent, and compassionate will serve you well.
Best regards,
Jeff
editor@myevt.com
